Adapting is putting off your old self to be made new. Your old self may be a weary, emotionally tattered half-person as familiar to you as a comfortable old bathrobe. To be made new is to find a new self. You may choose to put on your new self and wear it gladly or to shrug into it with reluctance. You may try it on for size and make some adjustments before you are satisfied with the fit. The effect of grief is that it enlarges you to accommodate a new self—a different and better self. You are created to be like God.